I want to share a brief account of how I arrived at this work.
In mid-1989, my life had collapsed. I was deeply addicted to alcohol and drugs, caught in patterns of thinking and behavior shaped by my own choices and generations of alcoholism before me. I could not stop or change my life on my own.
I tried many things. Nothing helped and I always returned to the same behavior . What ultimately mattered was not finding the “right belief,” but finding a way to re-orient my life toward something that could hold. I mention that method periodically in the podcast.
During that period, I was introduced to Buddhism through a Nichiren practice that involved chanting as a form of prayer and meditation. It helped me at a time when I had very little ground to stand on. Not long after, a friend gave me a copy of the I Ching. Neither of us knew much about it. I did not seek it out — it arrived.
Over time, I came to understand the I Ching not as superstition, but as an ancient symbolic system designed to help human beings orient themselves during periods of change. I have studied and consulted it soberly for decades, and it has profoundly shaped how I understand responsibility, timing, and humility.
As my life stabilized, I returned to education. I earned a degree in Human Services and a Certificate in Drug and Alcohol Studies then worked in mental health, and eventually returned to school to become a registered nurse. For many years I have worked in intensive care, where life, death, and limitation are unavoidable realities. That work has kept me grounded in what is real.
About twenty years ago, I stepped away from organized religion. It had helped me, but I am not built for doctrine. I am a seeker by temperament, and my spiritual life has always been experiential rather than institutional.
While solo backpacking in the High Sierra, I underwent a profound re-orientation — an experience that gave me a new understanding of a Higher Power that works for me, and of how I fit into a living universe. What mattered was not the experience itself, but what I brought back from it: a way of living that emphasized service, responsibility, and integration rather than belief.
Over the years, I studied various symbolic traditions — including Jungian psychology, shamanic frameworks, runes, and Tarot — not as predictive tools, but as languages of meaning. Eventually, Tarot became a way for me to reflect on process, threshold, and integration rather than outcomes.
During the COVID-19 pandemic, while working in the ICU, I needed a creative outlet that could hold what I was witnessing. That impulse eventually became the JohnsTarot podcast.
What I share here is not prophecy or certainty. It is an exploration of re-orientation, individuation, and how symbolic language can help human beings make sense of difficult passages without bypassing life.
This site documents that journey — not as instruction, but as witness.
If you recognize yourself in this terrain, you are welcome to walk it at your own pace.
If you would like to be a guest, contact me at John@johnstarot.net and we will do a internet interview.
Thank you for taking the time to read my message. Enjoy
John